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Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Liveblog S3 E10: Finding Judas

Sorry I'm late. Cuddy is pissed that officer Brownshirt froze Wilson's assets.

House just stole half Wilson's sammich.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Season 3 Episode 9: Whac-a-mole

Whoa, that's one helluva Chucky Cheese nightmare. I'm having flashbacks.

House says he knows what's wrong but wants to make a game out of it if the team can figure it out.

Wilson is whining.

Whoa! He's a gusher!

I missed a whole bunch of segments there due to household duties. Foreman's taking a spinal tap, and talking to the little girl. She's telling him that her dad used to drink and drive.

Foreman rolls the kid over and broke his rib. House is having problems with his shoulder. He's in serious pain. She takes his cane away.

House says the kid is sicker than they thought. Syphilis, botulism and something else. I missed it.

[commercial break]

House thinks he's a drug user because he's having seizures. He's in a steam room with Cameron, Foreman, and Chase. He's having another seizure. He was drug free. House stole the guy's cane. Classic!

House is demanding Cameron write him a scrip. Foreman sees something on a brain scan. They're everywhere. What are they?

[Commercial Break]

House wants to do a biopsy on the brain fluid or something. Now he wants Cuddy to get vicodin. Cuddy is hooking him up. "You cant lift your arm." "You can't pee standing up."

Aspergilus. Emotional trauma triggers genetic illness. House wants to five him more infections. Meningitis, the cold, serratia.

He can't breathe from the serratia. Whatever he has is serious. His lifespan will be short, and he'll be sick all the time. He agrees to Foreman.

Foreman and House are arguing because he thinks House is being insensitive. House asks him to sign the transplant consent form. He's not doing it yet. He's afraid to die during the procedure. House was right.

Wilson says the shoulder pain is from House's conscience. He's pissed. The kids are sad. Foreman gives him a you'll be proud of yourself speech.

House rides by Wilson.

[End of episode]

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Who Is Ready For Some House? Liveblogging 11/13/06

Season 3: Son of Coma Guy

Alright! Are we ready for the House Liveblogging?

Wilson: "boo hoo. I lied"

House gives the kid a seizure. I don't know about you, but that is one cool disorder. He can't see things when they move.

[Commercial Break]

Wait, I didn't write that! Where the hell did that come from?

Anyhoo, the kid has awakened from his seizure.

Awesome, The kid starts coughing up blood. House says to stop all treatment. The anti-seizure drugs are bad on the liver. House plans to wake the father from a coma.

Uh oh, Cuddy ain't havin' it. She says he's torturing the patient. She starts yelling at House, then wazzizface from Night Court wakes up. Dan, that's it. Dan wakes up.

[Commercial Break]

Hey, I'm not Dr. Fmragtops. I'm Dr. FIAR.

Wait a friggin' minute! How the hell did you get in this post?

You can't see things when they move. Back to the show. Dan is plenty coherent. House wants to know how aware he was while he was out. He knows his wife is dead, but not how long it's been. 10 years.

She died in a house fire. They tell him his son may be dying. He wants steak.

Wilson: "Caustic guy was waking up coma guy."

Technically vegitative state guy, Dr. *snicker* FIAR!

House: "Everything is conditional. We just can't always anticipate the conditions."

Officer Brownshirt is interrogating Cameron. They paged her to get her out of the interrogation. I wonder if his jackboots are polished.

He just thinks Dr. Cameron is hot. [I agree with whoever posted that]

House seems irritated every time someone calls it a coma instead of a vegetative state. He's going for a drive with Dan.

[Commercial break]

Will you stop that!

Will who stop what?

Okay, this is all in my head, I'll close my eyes and count to ten and it'll go away.

Well it appears Dan is allergic to berries, and House is interrogating Dan. Dan is not happy about this.

Wilson and House are engaged in a lover's quarrel. Now Dan and House are playing quid pro quo, all Hannibal Lecter style.

Officer IHateHouse is putting the screws to Chase!

Ha, and House makes the same Silence Of The Lambs allusion. Hmmm, apparently whatever was happening with the specter poster has disappeared.

Uh-Oh, the kid doesn't have mercury poisoning. Now House is really gonna start the interrogation.

[commercial break]

That was odd. As suddenly as the mysterious postings started, they have now stopped. It couldn't have been Dr. FIAR. After all, we're two separate people, right?

I missed a whole segment... or wait, no I didn't.

Dan is slipping. Foreman is being questioned by officer Brownshirt. Will someone just choke him already. House saves lives every week. Lay off him.

Dan wants to know why House became a doctor if he hates people. He tells a story about a janitor who was a doctor in Japan. No one liked the guy, until they needed him, because he was right.

The boy is seizing again. House asks what happened on the night of the fire.

Holy crap! House convinced Dan to kill himself, so he could give his son his heart! Creepy.

What'd I miss?

Officer Brownshirt froze Wilson's account.

[End of episode]

What the hell just happened?

Monday, November 13, 2006

Clinic Hours: Foot-In-Mouth Disease

So, What can I do for you?

Well, Doctor, I have a problem I could use your help with...

Sorry, I can't help you look less like a horse.

That's not what I'm talking about. You know how people have something that keeps them from saying every random thought that pops in their heads?.

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Yeah, and?

That thing is broken.

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Well, you know what they say. You can't fix stupid.

Tuesday, November 7, 2006

Liveblogging 11/07/06

Season 3: Que Sera Sera

Good evening, folks. Welcome to the latest liveblogging of everyone's favorite super-sarcastic saw-bones! Get ready....

Get set...

BTW, while you're waiting for House, you can go catch up on last night's episode of Prison Break at Prison Break Central!

And if you haven't gone to vote yet, you could always go write in Jack Bauer or Dr. House.


2000hrs: Apparently the firemen have to rescue a hippo! Man! They need a freakin' crane for that dude!

2007hrs: House is late because he is incarcerated! Fat man is in trouble if House can't make bail.

2010hrs: Wilson to the rescue!

2011hrs: The team is lost without House!

2012hrs: Apparently Chase hates fat people. He must be a Republican!

2015hrs: Now we're discussing the structural integrity of MRIs. I guess that's a healthy discussion when MRIing Hippos.

2018hrs: Let's see if this MRI collapses...

2020hrs: Whoa! Raging Hippo got stuck in the MRI. I doubt that thing will work properly again.

2025hrs: STDs? Oh my God! The shear logistics of Raging Hippo having sex with anything other than a cow are simply mindboggling... Raging Hippo wants to go home...Awww poor widdle baby *snicker*

2030hrs: I bet he's craving a baby. Baby, the other other white meat.

2031hrs: This cop really has it out for House. Cops generally don't give doctors a hard time for obvious reasons. ANyhoo, it appears Officer IHateHouse served a search warrant on House's...well house.

2035hrs: So is House going to federal pound you in the ass prison?

2036hrs: House wants to send Raging Hippo home, and the mutiny is on.

2040hrs: Oh snap! Raging Hippo done fell out, and went through a plate glass window. I wonder is seismologists are wondering what the hell just happened.

2042hrs: Okay, we got Haliburton drilling into Raging Hippo's head. He's freaking out again.

2045hrs: Heh, Raging Hippo is a conspiracy theorist. And Cameron calls Raging Hippo an idiot.

2050hrs: House is going to hire Dewayne-Wayne as his lawyer. Now that's a different world.

2052hrs: Ewww, Raging Hippo has yellow crusty fingernails.

2055hrs: Raging Hippo has cancer. Cameron used a bunch of words too large for me to comprehend.

2056hrs: Officer IHateHouse is turning up the heat on Dr. Wilson. House is going to Federal Pound You In The Ass Prison...probably.

2100hrs: What are the odds on House going to prison?